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Immigration

ij1889

New Member
this is a paper that i wrote for class, if you are bored and want something to do read through it and tell me what you think.
thanks
Ivan

Immigration, our ancestors took that bold step forward, leaving their country for new opportunities, a better life, and the American dream. What really is the American dream, the dream that has attracted millions of people since Columbus reached the Americas, giving people an opportunity to start again. Who reach it, who doesn’t? Who live it, who dies for it? And what is this crazy belief that keeps us coming back for more. For many they will say the it’s the money, money equals power and power is a very attractive thing to have in your corner, for others it’s the freedom of religion, a new start, a new job, school, a better life for their families back home, and there are many more other reasons that drive people to come to this great land, whether with the permission of the government or without it, it’s happened all throughout the life of this nation and It is something that will forever happen as long as the united states keeps being a symbol of hope by offering jobs, and a great education.
“Immigration law has swung back and forth throughout the 20th century, at times welcoming Mexican immigrants and at other times slamming the door shut on them. ” Immigration here in the United States has been a big issues all thought its history, some welcome it, and some turn their back on it. Unfortunately this is something that divides many Americans now and days. In our modern age the issue of Hispanic immigrants is brought up, people say that Hispanics are stealing the American people’s jobs, I thought the ex-Mexican president Vicente Fox said it best a couple years ago “Los Mexicanos hacen el trabajo que NI los negros hacen(the Mexican people work harder than the African Americans” (referring to slavery and the hard labor they did, this is a old saying that is used very commonly in Latin America) immigrants have always done the tougher jobs and people will always criticize foreigners in their country and make up excuses to try to get rid of them by spreading false truths as that immigrants steal jobs, are drunks, uneducated, and a bunch of criminals. Most big business loves it because immigrants have been the backbone building this country after slavery, by producing cheap and efficient labor. Our economy relies heavily on cheap labor to build housing, roads, and recyclable labor. Hispanic immigrants work 2-3 jobs fulltime without benefits or insurance in case of an accident. “By the end of the 19th century, many Mexican Americans had been deprived of their land, and found themselves living unprotected in an often hostile region. ” Immigrants have not always had rights; the Tejanos were screwed over by the United States government by not being protected, and their land being stolen from them by none other than the government. We have come a long way, but we have also not progressed as much as it would be ideal.
Push factors many times have to with governments and the way they do things. During the 1960’s when communism was spreading throughout South American the rich and middle class was scared, while the poor rejoiced in the idea, many people choose to flee their homes (especially in Cuba) and come to the United States to seek refuge from the dictatorships. In El Salvador they experienced a civil war lasting 12 years. The lack of jobs and education in south America is growing, in Ecuador people are fleeing the country at record numbers for various reason, there are no jobs to be had, all the local shops are being run by Chinese who have paid the government under the table to acquire visas, the middle class is fading due to the lack of jobs. “Ecuadorians will also be voting on a new constitution ” this new constitution if approved will get socialism on step closer to taking over this small nation and the upper-class is having to relocate due to government insecurity due to the President Correa and his socialist friends(Evo Morales and Hugo Chavez).

Between 1881-1930 29 million people migrated to the united state from Europe, today since 1981-2010(projected) 38 million people have migrated from all over the world, and most of them have come from south of the border, central America and south America. This number is a lot bigger than the European migration in 1881-1930 , but the reason for that being is that technology has come a long way in just the last 100 years. Traveling now is so much easier, we have somewhat fuel efficient cars that can go almost anywhere, trains, planes, and boats, they did have some of these technologies back then but they were not as easy to get around in as now and days. Still most illegal immigrants come here with their visas by plane and just stay instead of heading home. In Cuba people migrate by boat and try to reach Florida which is 80 miles away. from central and south America, many people sneak into Mexico, and then they hire a “coyote” (nickname for a person who receives money in order to sneak a person into the united states) and then from Mexico the 2 main ways are by crossing the dessert into the country, or by taking a boat in Mexico and arrive somewhere in a eastern coast. Many people do lose their lives trying to cross into the United States but they do it with the American dream in mind.
The American Dream; who reach it, who doesn’t? Who live it, who dies for it? The people who reach the American dream are the ones who become successful at what they do, the ones who don’t are the ones who die trying or get caught in the act, and thousands of lives vanish every year in the attempt to reach the Promised Land. Most of us live the American dream, our parents couldn’t give us the world so we have to take it, and this is the story of most of the population in the world. And the ones who die for it are the ones who protect the liberties we have to live in this nation from any threats created mankind. “The border is ineffective and deporting illegal migrants does not work: removed by train, they return on foot. Outsiders put a strain on housing, especially for the poor, and on hospitals and schools. But employers do not care: farmers want cheap labor, and rich families need skillful foreign gardeners and housekeepers. ” Immigration is a vicious cycle that goes over and over again, and as long as there is labor needed immigrants will be there to get the job done and help companies and countries prosper immensely.
 

YSOSLO

is the word, beotch
Ivan what's the paper supposed to be about?...I mean obviously immigration, but are you supposed to be writing in general about it or is there a certain goal in mind with this or what? Overall I think it's a pretty good paper, but you definitely have a LOT of typos to clean up and stuff like that.
 

ZoomZoom Diva

New Member
The way it is presented is making it very difficult to read. It's more like a stream of consciousness than paper outlining an organized series of thoughts. LOTS of run-on sentences that need to be split and defined better.

Step away from the paper and outline what the main point is you are trying to say and the position you are taking on that point (if applicable) then organize around that.
 
M

mazdamn02

Guest
+1, you lost me at the second sentence, because it wasn't going anywhere...
Need moar gramar ;), keep on writing though!
 
J

JustROLLIN

Guest
" the Tejanos were screwed over by the United States government by not being protected "

Very eloquent... I would choose a different verb there. ;) You obviously have some strong opinions and thoughts about this topic, but as already mentioned, need some better structure. Also, MS Word would help in this case. It underlines the sentence when you have run-ons and offers possible corrections.
 

dmention7

Hater
I agree with the above. It seems like you have some strong opinions and there are probably some good points in there, but it's difficult to read in the way it's written (James' stream-of-consciousness is a good description).

It's a good starting point as a collection of ideas and thoughts, but I think your next step needs to be to read what you've written, and then try to pick out the key points that were made. Once you have a collection of those key points, think about how they relate to each other, and form them into a more coherent structure. Then once you have that outline, take another stab at turning it into an essay.

If you have trouble at the essay point, remember the paragraph structure you were taught back in school: State your position, list 3-5 arguments supporting that position, then sum it up with a sentence or two that wraps everything together. Run your key points through that process, and see what you come up with.

Don't be afraid to run through multiple drafts... sometimes it takes that long to get all your thoughts collected and organized.
 
J

JustROLLIN

Guest
^^ Fantastic points. Also remember to read it out loud to yourself, or have someone else read it out loud. Its incredible how different it sounds once it leaves your head and is actually spoken.
 

ij1889

New Member
yeah its a rough draft that im working on during this weekend, its supposed to be mainly about hispanic migration, part one of the paper
 

YSOSLO

is the word, beotch
I guess if this is part one, then I wouldn't get too far into how immigrants are used or exploited to today's culture so that you're writing in more of a timeline or something. Maybe start with the time when immigration began and work your way forward. Then in part two or part three you can get more into how the role of immigrants has or hasn't changed. The Texanos part would still probably fit into part one, but depending on the type of paper you're trying to write (historical or opinion/influential) you may or may not want to include things like Joe mentioned above with the "screwed over" thing or comments like "employers do not care" about immigrants or illegal immigration. If the paper is supposed to be simply informative, then personal feelings might be frowned upon by the teacher/professor. If it's supposed to be more of an influential paper, then as Jay mentioned above, outline the main points at the beginning of the paper, think of the points as hoops you want to make sure you lead the reader through, and then make sure you have a few sentences illustrating each point and then flesh it out from there...and don't forget the recap at the end, to summarize and bring everything to a clear conclusion and tie it all together.
 
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